It is easy to blame our fears upon the negative afflictions of our past. To allow a certain moment in time to hold us back, frozen in its very clutches. We try to move forward, but we are simply inhibited, controlled by the terror of what it means to actually break free.
When the demons haunt us, it is because we are not yet ready to face the lesson. Maybe we understand part of the lesson, but we have not yet come to fully embrace it. We have not yet done the healing required to turn the lesson into wisdom. And so, we barricade ourselves behind great walls of self defense, building a little fortress in which to keep us safe, and protected.
It is a maneuver that buys us time. Time to heal. Time to understand. Time to grow. But if we are not careful, if we choose to dwell on the pain, we become in jeopardy of finding ourselves locked behind those walls forever.
I flow with the tides; when they are high, oh how I ride those swells with great joy. When they are low, I allow myself to succumb to them, to allow them to wrap me in their sweet torment so that I can come to understand, through feeling, what it all means. While I may get caught up in those tumultuous swells at times, I choose not to fight them, for they were meant to catch hold of me and drag me under, for as long as necessary, until I achieve the desired result of the lesson. It is for this reason that I never allow the walls to keep me guarded behind them too deeply.
While there are things worth fighting for, there are just as equally things that are worth letting go. We have all found ourselves on the outside edge of a healing moment, twirling as we turn the wounds into beautiful scars, ready to let go of something that, for a period of time in which it was necessary, provided us with the most amazing of things. Perhaps it was a friend or a partner that stood by your side, someone who helped you to believe in yourself again when you were feeling lost and weak.
With this realization, you may find yourself with tears streaming down your cheeks. Not because you are sad that it seems that you must bid adieu, but because you are smiling for the very fact that it happened. This is what life is about. To know and understand that while we cannot control every thing that happens to us, we do have the power to choose how we want to react to it. And so, you find yourself steering your ship out of the storm, with an exuberant tickle in your soul for having had the good fortune to have experienced that moment in your life.
I have always been one to fight for what I believe in, and for the people that I care about. However, I have learned, over the years, that I do not always need to be the only one doing the fighting. Sometimes, the best that you can do is throw complete trust into the universe and know, and hope, that in letting all things be as they will, that everything will turn out exactly as you want it to.
Above and beyond all this good wisdom ‘let all things be as they will’ stuff, one of the most invaluable things that I have learned is that something amazing worth fighting for is my Self. And so, I relinquish my Self, completely and wholly, to the waves. Let them carry me as they will, built upon the intentions and desires of others, and of the universe. I know enough now to know that the people who need me in their life, the waves will flow towards their intentions, away and on from the people who really could not find themselves to be bothered with fighting for me the same way that I would them. More importantly, I know that the universe has my back and will bring only good lessons (no matter how painful the journey may be to get to them) and good experiences my way.
I thank my lucky stars that I have found something worth fighting for. Life. Joy. And love.
What is your something worth fighting for?